Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts (1098)

RANDOM THOUGHTS: THE SEC FILED

The SEC filed charges against Sean David Morton, a psychic who calls himself America's Prophet. Morton apparently didn't foresee the action so he's also likely to be charged with false advertising. If he is removed from his companies, they will be deemed non-prophet businesses. ...  Is it correct to refer to an execution by electrocution as an early termination charge?

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RANDOM THOUGHTS-ONSTAR'S LATEST

OnStar's latest feature automatically notifies the driver when a car has been recalled and specifying which part is likely to fail and when. The company will call devices offering this feature the DeathStar model. ... Captain Chesley Sullenberger, who is retiring from the airline business, has been offered a job in the automotive business. His challenge is to see if he can land a Toyota on the Hudson, which seemed the best place for many of the company's cars at the moment. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: NICE THING ABOUT

Nice thing about Toyota's problems with the accelerators in its cars. They will speed up on the way to the junk yard. ... Family history research is a big hobby for me. Someone asked if I was afraid I'd find black sheep in the family. I replied, "Oh, no. I have most of their phone numbers."  I noted I have a lot of first, second and third cousins, but in several cases I prefer those with whom I can keep Six Degrees of Separation ... Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: BENJAMIN FRANKLIN

Benjamin Franklin has a well-known saying that beer is God's way of saying he loves us and wants us to be happy. He also had a statement that begins "Wine makes daily living easier ..." But few knew he also said that “Vodka is God's way of making us see the beauty in others, at least until we sober up the next day.” Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: BEER

Beer may be good for your bones, according to a newly released study that continues to show the beneficial impact of a wide variety of alcoholic beverages. Since vodka and red wine are supposed to be good for your heart, I figure if I just stay in a drunken stupor I’ll be in the best of health. ... Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS-REGISTERING NEW PRODUCTS

Registering new products, like the multi-function printer we just bought, can be a pain. I think the one for the software said, "Enter your 150-chracter serial number. It can be found somewhere on the inside of the printer; we think. Next, you put your left foot in ... And then the concern over security is just getting out of hand. When I signed up for paying one bill online, I was instructed on choosing a password. "Enter your password in one of the following languages: Navajo, Ossetian or Vlach." ... Las Vegas officials were offended that President Obama talking about citizens being forced to choose between gambling or wasting their money on trivial items like food and college. What he should have said was "Las Vegas is a wonderful destination. I can't think of a better place in which hard-working people can dispose of their money. It's certainly a worthwhile investment in times like these." He also could have noted, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and if it doesn’t you should seek immediate medical attention." ... There's a sequel to the movie "Total Recall" in the works. Turns out it's about Toyota automobiles. The American automobile industry is preparing a bouquet of flowers and thank cards for delivery to Toyota's headquarters. ... A friend noted that cars are getting so technologically oriented that soon surfing the Web from your car will be routine. After a crash, the system will automatically notify first responders and will display names and addresses of local funeral homes and the prices of various service packages, along with the names of lawyers specializing in personal injury accidents. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: MY TRIP TO INDIANA

While visiting my mom in Indiana we talked about the usual small town stuff: That the soy bean crop was good; Which relatives were expecting babies; How the guy on the next farm was busted for operating a meth lab. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: THE NBA

The NBA is creating a new position for its professional basketball teams, following the legal troubles of Washington Wizards Player Gilbert Arenas for pointing guns at a teammate in a locker room - team parole officer. Along with working on the three-two defense, NBA teams will coach their players on the insanity defense. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS; THE LATEST TV SHOW

The latest TV sitcom proposal is a hilarious show called, "Peacock" in which incompetent executives of a major network do everything they can to screw up their late night programming and alienate stars. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: GOING THROUGH TIMES SQUARE

Going through Times Square, now almost squeaky clean and very touristy, I was remembering how the area was 25 years ago: live sex shows, three-card monte games, shady characters at the entrance of vacant store fronts. Call me old-fashiond, but I miss those things.

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