Let's talk about the 1800s. ....  My plane was delayed because a coach passenger had gone down the elite access lane and the carpet had to be ritually cleaned. …. I think the airlines are taking advantage of us in the effort to draw more revenue. I was standing in the bathroom when I heard, “Deposit 75 cents for three more minutes.” And pay toilets? They aren't new. But to pay to get out? ….  The new full body scans at the airports have benefits. On the latest trip, they not only found no evidence of explosive but they said my lungs and heart looked extremely healthy. … There’s been a real development in the threat from underwear bombs. More stylish explosives are now available in both jokey and boxers styles. ...  What’s the difference between a cattle stampede and flying economy? The cattle have more legroom. … California, of course, is the land of the freeway. Freeway is taken from an old Indian world meaning ‘you can’t get there from here.”  ... For opera fans, it's not just that it's over when the fat lady sings. It’s just as true that it’s not over until the tenor dies.