Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 53 seconds

RANDOM THOUGHTS: DINA LOHAN

Dina LohanA judge has ordered celebrity mom, Dina Lohan, to undergo psychiatric evaluation. The family qualifies for a group rate under its medical plan. Actually, daughter Lindsay is financing a new movie with points earned from her Frequent Treatment plan. ... A news item this week says that an examination of DNA has led scientists to conclude humans interbred with a mystery species, one other than the Neanderthals and the Denisovans. I think that explains some of my cousins. There was another story that a two-headed stingray had been found. I think they are from the same part of my family.

... I didn't leave my heart in San Francisco (no one would have been willing to send it back), but I did leave my cell phone in Sao Paulo Brazil. I think the hotel was unfair. Not only was the fee for shipping it back high, but they demanded I install the "Girl from Ipanema" as my ringtone. ...For those who are considering traveling to Sao Paulo for the World Cup next year, given traffic conditions in that city, I'd advise starting your trip now. You should reach the stadium in time for the first games. ...The FCC is considering allowing passengers to make cell phone calls on flights. The airlines are looking at a potential bonanza by offering martial arts courses for other passengers to deal with callers. ... In celebrity news, paramedics had to be called to the home of singer Miley Cyrus after she tied her two top knots of hair too tight, cutting off circulation to her brain. Some would argue help arrived two years too late. ... There's a new board game out, Political Gridlock, in which the elected leaders of an imaginary nation face off over national policy. The winner is the first party to convince the majority of voters that problems are the other party's fault. Meanwhile, it's been predicted by the time immigration reform is enacted, it won't matter because all the illegals will be dead and their grandkids will have been born in this country, ... There has been criticism of U.S. Rep. Michelle Bachmann for posing for a picture with a lion she had killed. Not surprisingly, no one wanted to publish a picture of her having killed an elephant or donkey.

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