The guy next door is our neighborhood's angry-old man. A couple of nights ago, he sat in his car in front of his house for hours setting off and silencing the car's alarm system. I didn't start to worry until I found a piece of paper in his garbage can that was filled with the phrase "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy"

My wife said she was going to a "Girl's Night Out" event this weekend. I said, "Don't you mean 'Older Women's Night' Out?" ... My wife and I are just a couple of romantics. I called her mid-week and asked, "Are we doing anything Saturday?" "Yes, we're going to that memorial service." "Probably not for our anniversary." "Oh." ... I was somewhat taken aback at the headline in the area weekly newspaper today:

After referring to Elizabeth Warren as Pocahontas because of her small percentage native American ancestry, GOP president candidate Donald Trump then doubled down against the Republican establishment referring to them as the "Lost Boys". He also attacked the latest X-Men movie promising to ban mutants from the country and to prevent prisoners from being released from the Phantom Zone in the Superman story. Democrats immediately questioned the parentage of Trump's hair. ... I was noticing a news item that a cat in Las Vegas alerted its owners to a house fire. I always suspected our cat would more likely start the fire.